Remember last year, when those Buzzfeed quizzes were all the rage? Which Disney Princess Are You? Which 90210 Character Are You? Which Movie Soundtrack Should Be Your Theme Song?
I took every single one.
I love personality tests – even when they’re not real and only serve as conversation starters at best and social media clickbait at worst. I took the full Myers-Briggs type indicator assessment twice in college. And a few years ago, when several friends began talking about the Enneagram personality model, I was fascinated. Most recently I devoured every word of a deep, insightful article title, “Here’s Which Taylor Swift Song You Are Based On Your Myers-Briggs Personality Type.”
What did we do before the internet, you guys?
Seriously, though, I do think there is actual value in knowing ourselves well. When we know our tendencies, our strengths and weaknesses, our triggers and struggles, we can make better choices and live stronger, healthier, more God-honoring lives. I’m not saying that’s the goal of any of those online quizzes, of course! But understanding who we are is important.
Understanding our daughters is important, too.
Last month I visited a friend and mentioned how different my two girls are. She asked me for more details. She wanted to know specifically HOW they were different. It seemed like a simple question, but honestly, I was stumped. After nearly two years of reacting and managing and just-getting-by, I realized I hadn’t spent much time in deeper reflection about my children. I hadn’t really looked at the bigger picture of their personalities or their hearts. I’d simply been dealing with the day-to-day, sleeping when I could, and then doing it again.
Sometimes that is the best a tired mama can do, and that is okay! When life is hard or hectic or, for whatever reason, hurried, we moms simply don’t have time to slow down and ponder what’s going on inside those adorable heads.
But when we do get a chance to breathe and to pray and to listen and to think clearly, it’s good for us to consider how God has made our girls. Because, though we share a gender and possibly a hair color or eye shape or body type or food preferences, our girls are not us. They are unique souls God made with all the creativity in the universe. They are individuals. They are different and special and amazing.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
And if we don’t ever take a moment to examine what we know about them and ask God for His insight into their hearts, they will also be mysterious and down-right confusing!
I’ll be honest with you: That’s where I am right now. I could tell you dozens of characteristics of my eight-year-old, but if you want to know her learning style, I’m not sure. If you want to know how she best communicates, I don’t know that either. I could tell you her love languages easily, and I’m figuring out her relational style as we navigate the social life of the elementary stage. But as my friend’s question has echoed in my heart over the past few weeks, I’ve realized that I have a lot to learn about my girls.
I’m so grateful to have time to find answers to my questions – and I know that God will guide me as I learn about these amazing girls He’s created. I’m thankful for the truth of James 1:5: “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and He will give it to you.”
How are you getting to know your daughters? How do you figure out the ins and outs of your daughters’ personalities and hearts? Will you share with us in the comments?