For some reason, teenagers feel the most vulnerable around the same time their mommas are ready to go to bed. Like clockwork, that’s when their hearts begin to bubble up with honest emotions and they are finally ready to talk.
My girl definitely needed to talk, as tears streamed down her face shortly after I said I was going to head to bed. The Holy Spirit forced me into a u-turn as I sat down next to her at the table. She began to describe something that happened to her early that day at school. It was so hard to parse out the facts as her tears gushed from her heart.
Was it really that malicious or was she misinterpreting the intent?
Was her pain isolated to this one incident or was there a ruptured wound from the past?
I don’t know about you, but when my girl is consumed with emotion, it makes it hard to think clearly. Thankfully, my life coach training kicks into gear and the habit of seeking the One who knows all takes overs. Through asking open-ended questions focusing on drawing out the Truth, the Lord will be the One to reveal His answers for the problem at hand. So, with the Lord’s prompting, I asked questions like these:
Sweetheart, share with me how that made you feel as opposed to what happened.
What does God have to say about that?
What Scripture verses come to mind, based on how you feel and what you know?
What would it take for you to walk forward in the Truth and not based on how you feel?
An hour later, we didn’t have answers as to the why of the whole situation occurred, but my daughter certainly had a game plan for moving forward — starting off with believing Scripture over emotions. (This is what I call applying the Trap & Transform principle in Meet the New You). As we headed off to bed, I kept praying for God’s truth to trump her feelings and for Him to lead her in whatever action steps she need to take.
The next day, I was totally honest with God about my fears, concerns, and what I thought she should do about the situation, but I took one of my good friend’s advice and kept my mouth shut when it came to talking about the situation with my girl. And I am so glad I did because I got to see God answer a very specific prayer: I asked the Lord to give my daughter the confidence to address the situation with key people involved and walk forward in Truth. I never told her what to do nor how I was praying, so you can imagine my delight when I heard relay how she talked to “so and so” about the situation and decided that she wasn’t going to let that one incident change her perspective about herself or make her cower in a corner.
Oh my friends, what a privilege to see God work in such a specific way. It left me so humbled and motivated to keep on praying — not because of the answer, but because of the opportunity!
Prayer isn’t about getting “the” answer.
It’s about the opportunity to see God work in a way we might have missed if we hadn’t turned our hearts to Him in the first place.
So why don’t we just make a deal with each other right now to turn to the Lord in prayer for those needs of our daughters (and sons) and our role in parenting them?
Take the time to talk to God about your girl. He knows her life inside and out. He knows your abilities to be her mom. He knows what you both need, where you need to be stretched, how you need to be sanctified, and the way in which He is planning to use “all” in a beautiful, transformation work in your life and hers.
So go . . . talk to Him today. And make a plan for talking to Him every day from here on out.